My experience of proposing a guy ๐Ÿ’“๐Ÿ‘ฑ

Hahaha if my friends, if they are here right now, they wont let me post this ๐Ÿ˜‚
this is emberassing, they would say. and for some people, if a girl proposing a guy it looks like that girl has no self-esteem but, yeah, i dunno i dont feel like i dont feel self-esteem i feel normal hehe. maybe girl’s personality is different from guy thats why people think its better for a guy to propose a girl but i tell you, girls are not all the same.
when i was 11, one of my friend who just got a new boyfriend said that he proposed that guy and it means not that guy who said ‘ILY’ first and i was like, “what the hell? where is your self-esteem?!” and then she broke up because of what i said haha poor girl ๐Ÿ‘…
but then i know how it feels as i grew up and met a guy.
he is older than me in some years, he is handsome and such a sweetheart. he cares for me a lot and he is the one who wants to listen to me when nobody is there for me. but he is always there. we became closer and closer and, after some months we become friend, i felt that love.
and because we often share things together, he shares his story to me too. he said there was a girl that she has been known for some years and that they are close and even closer than himself to me and and and andddd i got jelous.
and the next day, i share my story to him too. i said i got jelous. im in love with a guy(i didnt tell him it was him) my heart broke into pieces(lol its not that bad actually) and i want that guy to know my feeling and stop, just stop talking about her.
he said, “tell that guy, then”
i said, “tell him what?”
“that you are in love with him. that you dont want him to talk about that girl anymore. and if he loves you back, that will be a luck”
i said, ” i cant! im a girl!”
he said, “you know what? my ex propose me first. i even want a girl to propose me again hahaha”
and i was like, okay, this is my turn to propose u then!
sooo then i told him, “What should i tell that guy?”
he wrote a love letter as an example to me, “just tell him,
i donno why
i feel jelous when you talk about her
maybe it because
i love you”
and so i did.
i sent him a msssg,
“i donno why
i feel jelous when you talk about (the girl’s name)
maybe it because
i love you”
i was shaking sooo much and i cant breath when i saw a mssg from him oooh and then i opened that mssg carefully and then…
“what? is it true?”
he didnt believe it.
“yes it is”
and he replied me with the nicest sentence a guy-who-doesnt-love-you-back could ever wrote,
“you know what? the best relationship in life is friendship” he just wanna be my friend and thats okay. atleast he appreciate my feeling and he never talked about that girl anymore. and that we become closer and now i dont have feeling for him anymore haha. but i still remember that moment when i still in love with him he told me that, “i cant believe that you love me! i mean, i always asking myself everyday like, ‘why is this girl hate me?’ ‘couse i thought you hate me and will always be!”
oh, my. is that what a guy always think about a girl that loves him? ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜˜ guy is weird. i showed him my feeling by calling him ‘darling’ everyday (before he knew that i love him) but he still thinks i hate him haha.

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